The Command & Conquer series has long held a warm, fuzzy place in my heart. When I first acquired my own personal computer at 14, Command & Conquer was there to welcome me into the realm of PC gaming. It was the first game to introduce me to the world of Real-time Strategy… until then, I’d been content with jumping on goombas and taking baddies out one at a time in the first-person perspective. Command & Conquer allowed me to build and control an entire army all my own, and I had a blast with it. Over the years as the games advanced and evolved into Red Alert, Tiberian Sun, Red Alert 2, Generals and C&C 3, I’ve enjoyed blasting my way through thousands upon thousands of Nod and Soviet scum, and I’ll be damned if I didn’t have a great time doing it. Every addition to the series has seemed to add something new and exciting to the franchise, from unit experience and leveling in Generals to the much-improved live-action cutscenes, graphics, and voiceover work in C&C3.

So with that in mind, I absolutely cannot wait for the release of the next installment of the Command & Conquer series: Red Alert 3! More than eight years since the release of the last Red Alert, this new incarnation looks absolutely gorgeous and is sure to blow all past C&C games out of the water. It’s nearly impossible for me to watch the below trailer and not drool on my keyboard. Hearing “Hell March”, one of the most badass songs every written for a video game, just brings back so many warm memories.

Directed by: John Moore
Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Mila Kunis, Beau Bridges & Chris O’Donnell
Release Date: October 17, 2008

Face it, Wahlberg is always at his best when he’s playing the badass. Four Brothers, The Departed, We Own the Night, Shooter, The Italian Job, Fear… the list goes on. I’m extremely glad to see his only performance in 2008 won’t be his horrendous bout as nice-guy science teach, Elliot Moore, in The Happening. Max Payne looks to be just the thing to restore my faith in Marky Mark’s ability to kick some ass and act at a level higher than a junior high drama student.

Based on the video game series, Max Payne will follow DEA Agent, Max Payne (played by Mark Wahlberg of course) as he tries to solve a series of murders in New York City while unraveling the conspiracy behind the death of his family. Helping him along the way is assassin Mona Sax (Mila Kunis) who’s on a mission to avenge her sister’s death… all while being hunted by the police, the mob, and a ruthless corporation (thanks IMDB!). Expect a gratuitous multitude of blazing guns, slow motion explosions, trippy drug-induced hallucinations, and a dash of mystery and suspense to round out that “plot” thing people are always talking about. Hell, it sounds like a good time to me.

Personally, I wouldn’t be someone who would stand in huge line for anything aside from a rollercoaster. But I’m also not the kind of dick who would openly mock people that do decide to wait in line for a product directly to their faces… while on the job… on live TV. Reporter Eric Spillman from Los Angeles’ KTLA proved that he, on the other hand, is exactly that kind of dick by asking iPhone fanatics such news-worthy questions as “have you ever seen a naked woman before?” Oh, how original Mr. Newsman. That question hits so close to home… none of us have ever been able to so much as get to first base, what with our extreme awkwardness, giant glasses and binary-talk and all. We’re geeks! We just stay at home all day and eat Cheetos, drink Mountain Dew and play our internet games on our nerdy computersss (okay, maybe some of us do). Either way, I hate to tell you Eric, but geeks are the new cool. We control everything. Don’t piss us off or we’ll blue screen your laptop and tell you to blow us when you call for tech support. Then we’ll see who’s mocking who, ass.

As some people may know, back in the wee years of 2000 to 2004, I was the website designer and webmaster for the Elektra-signed hard rock band Systematic. Working with them was wonderful, and I think it really helped propel me to where I am now in my career (story forthcoming). Well, last night on my drive home from the movies (of course), a few tunes came on my iPod, and I felt an overwhelming urge to share them with everyone. They’re a few lesser known tracks the band released as online exclusives on their official website.

Tim Narducci, Adam Ruppel and the boys recorded Blue Oyster Cult‘s classic “Career of Evil” and posted it on the site to introduce drummer-extraordinarre Paul Bostaph to the Systematic crew, as well as to serve as a teaser to their sophomore (and ultimately final) album “Pleasure to Burn”. Personally, I absolutely love this cover. It just plain rocks my socks off. Check it out:

Danish metallers Pyramaze are currently one of my favorite bands. Their style of aggresive, often progressive power metal makes for quite a few interesting and epic tunes that never cease to get my head banging and the devil horns waving. The songs “Mighty Abyss” and “What Lies Beyond” are a couple of my all time favorite tunes and really show Pyramaze’s talent at constructing well-crafted and catchy material. With their newest release, Immortal, they tapped ex-Iced Earth frontman Matt Barlow to fill the band’s vacant vocalist slot. Barlow had long been working as police officer in Delaware after retiring from the music industry in 2003, and I couldn’t have been happier to hear he had seemingly returned to his true calling after 5 years of silence. Since my ears were first blessed with Barlow’s diverse, powerful voice, I’ve been a huge fan and I was happy to see I’d be able to rock out to some new tunes fronted by the man himself.

However, once Barlow returned to Iced Earth (a decision I back fully, as I absolutely love that band), it seemed Pyramaze would need to find yet another voice to express the energy and soul behind their music. Luckily for me and every other metal fan out there, it seems they’ve done just that. Earlier this week, Pyramaze mainman, Michael Kammeyer, announced that after many long months of auditions for a new frontman, they’ve chosen ex-Tad Morose frontman, Urban Breed to join the band’s ranks. Michael’s comments from pyramaze.com below:

While we all wait in anticipation for the next season of The Office to hit the cable tubes this Fall, NCB has been kind enough to give us Internet-capable fans some tasty little glimpses into Dunder Mifflin’s off-season. The first of a number of webisodes has been posted on nbc.com, and it follows the exploits of our favorite office faux-tard Kevin. Watch below as he delves into the fraudtacular world of misused business loans!

For a glimpse into the upcoming Office webisodes, check out nbc.com (as long as you don’t mind being ocularly-raped by internet commericals).