Directed by: Scott Derrickson
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Jennifer Connelly, Jaden Smith, Kathy Bates
Released: December 12, 2008

“The Day the Earth Stood Still” follows the story of Klaatu (Keanu Reeves), and alien visitor who comes to Earth to give an important message to all the leaders of our planet. This turns out to be a difficult task when he is first shot, then help captive by a scared and confused U.S. government. With the help of Gort, a giant robot accompanying Klaatu that is only used in times of violence, Klaatu delivers his message in a destructive and terriffying manner. Dr. Helen Benson (Jennifer Connelly) and her son Jacob (Jaden Smith) are the only people that can convince Klaatu that we have a chance as a species… that we can be saved. But is it already too late? Dunn-duunnn-DUUUUUNNNN!

Now, be warned… ahead thar be spoilers!

I’m sad to say that this film retains nearly none of the elements that made the original 1951 sci-fi flick such an endearing classic. Like most, if not all, big-budget Hollywood remakes, this movie trades in it’s message, and dare I say, “soul”, for a shallow, special effect-laden thrillride…  chock full of helicopter crashes, explosions, car chases and mass destruction that (not so surprisingly) has nearly nothing to do with the original film.

This new adaptation of “The Day the Earth Stood Still” drastically changes why Klaatu and Gort make an unexpected visit to Earth. While the original had Klaatu preemptively saving himself and all other races throughout the cosmos from humankind’s hatred and intolerance, this new, snazzier version has Kaltuu coming to Earth to rescue it from us. While all in all not an inadequate revision to the plot, it still makes me feel a little cheated, since it seems to pull on our newly-reinvigorated “green” heartstrings. But I move on… the overall story isn’t the real problem. The real problem is how poorly it’s executed.

First off, the opening scene is completely unneeded. Why do filmmakers feel that all moviegoers need to be spoonfed every single element of the plot? I don’t need to see exactly how the hypothesized collected DNA sample was harvested… just leave it as it should be… a hypothesis. It doesn’t matter! It’s the unexplained elements in movies that keep me and many other fervent movie fanatics absorbed… because it’s these aspects of movies that make it feel real.

When the story shifted to the present day, I found myself quite enthralled for the first half an hour or so (when I wasn’t being completely distracted by the shit in the first row with the uberbright cellphone that is). There was a good deal of buildup and a somewhat interested twist in how the story begins that I wasn’t expecting. The trailers have been quite misleading to say the least. However, after Klaatu’s inevitable escape, I found things got very boring very quickly. Sure there was action. There were explosions. There were chases. But it was all so unlike the original film, I couldn’t help but wonder where they were going with all this. Hell, the event the original film was named after doesn’t even take place until the tail end of the movie in a MUCH-changed and far less monumental manner… one of the main reasons this film was so disappointing (more on that to come).

As for the acting in this film, the overall reaction from me was… meh. Not oddly at all, Keanu Reeves plays just as hollow and lifeless a character as is his norm with Klaatu, though at least this time it was something the story called for. It would have been nice, however, to see a bit more emoting on Klaatu’s part as he realizes how complicated and wonderful we as a race really are (well, shucks, aren’t we just great?). Jennifer Connelly is able to pull off her character of Helen Benson nicely… she’s no novice to rolls of great distress, so she was able to convey the kind of emotion I think anyone would feel in situations like those arising in this movie. I think she shows this well in the first (pre-arrival) act of the movie… which, along with the 20 minutes or so afterwards is probably the only real tolerable part of the film. Kathy Bates was acceptable as Defense Secretary Regina Jackson, though I found her character quite forgettable.

One character I wish I was able to forget is that of Helen’s son, Jacob. In my (never-faulty and always magnanimous) opinion, Jaden Smith took up far too much screen time as Jacob. While the original character of Bobby Benson from the 1951 version of the film played a pivotal role in showing the “good” side of mankind to Klaatu, Jaden Smith’s version is little more than an annoyance to both his mother and the alien visitor. If acting like an all around brat is one of mankind’s most charming features, he was able to get that across to our intergalactic guest perfectly.

Now when we finally trudge through the film and get to the climax, it simply couldn’t have felt more unmoving and hollow. The original has Klatuu presenting the people of Earth a message of great importance and reflection before departing. To prove his people’s seriousness and power, he stopped all electronic devices worldwide for a single hour. This certainly got people’s attention, and his message was taken to heart before he soared away, leaving us to decide how to continue our existence. After seeing that ending, you felt that the human race may see the error of our ways and attempt to improve ourselves… move away from our hurtful and narrow-minded ways to save ourselves.

The new ending offered little more than a cgi-extravaganza of destruction followed by an extremely abrupt exit that leaves the entire planet in the dark ages without any understanding of why. No message. No anything.

Does Klatuu’s people really think taking away our technology will make us a better civilization? We’ve lived the last 150 years dependent on electricity… destroying that would simply cause worldwide panic and chaos! This isn’t an ending that advocates hope… it contains the same elements as the beginning of a horror movie. Horray! The human race is saved! Now let’s watch as all critically ill patients die in unpowered hospitals, the wealth of every person and nation disappears into an electronic abyss, and every aspect of our society is upturned and destroyed! Thanks for stepping in to help us out!

By stopping Gort from destroying our race he didn’t change anything. Only now instead of a swarming horde of metallic microorganisms swallowing us into oblivion, it will be the human race killing each other as we’re thrown head first into the dark ages! Why couldn’t Klaatu’s people, in their all-knowing judgmental wisdom, simply teach us how to power our technology in a manner that is not harmful to the planet we inhabit? That’s supremely better than killing off an entire civilization! And it sure sounds easier, not to mention a hell of a lot tidier.

This of course brings us to the supreme question: why? Why why why? Did we really need a remake of such a timeless classic? Like a runaway diesel train towing a line of half-retarded movie producer-filled cars, the Remake Express continues to plow through nearly every single film released since the golden age of celluloid in hopes of cashing in on our pre-existing fondness of the source material. Like others have said before me, “what will the Hollywood studios remake in 30 years?” Hell, will there even be any new material for studios to remake for a quick buck?

All in all, I found this to be an unneeded and ultimately unwelcome remake of a film that needs no revision. If you haven’t seen the original, then by all means check it out and see what you think. My bet is you’ll find it just as soulless and empty as I did. If you have seen the original… don’t bother. It will only make you angry at the outright bastardization of a classic piece of cinema.