I can’t quite recall the first time I heard the name Aron Ralston. I beleive I was first introduced to Aron’s story by Maddox, though it appears his description of what happened in May of 2003 differs slightly from Aron’s account. According to the man himself, while canyoneering (whatever the hell that is) in Utah, a boulder fell on his right forearm, crushing and pinning it against the canyon wall. For over 5 days Aron was trapped; completely unable to free his arm or move the boulder… and he eventually made the (insanely ballsy) decision to cut off his own hand. He knew it was the only way he would be able to get out of the canyon, so he took out his dull multi-tool and got to work.

GOD. DAMN.

Now, reading a description of an event is one thing. I’d heard this story for years… but hearing the man himself describe in detail every moment of his “home” surgery is something completely different. After watching this video of Aron describing how he was able to break the bones in his arm and cut off his pinned, decaying hand, all I can think is, “oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my dear fucking god.” I can only hope I would be able to follow in his example if in the same situation… but honestly, I really hope I never have to find out. Check out the following video and tell me you don’t feel the same way:

These ‘Office’ webisodes are just getting better and better. After Kevin has a run-in with what must be the least intimidating loan sharks in Scranton, Darryl decides to tell it like it is and steps in to help Kevin get his much-needed loan… while lining his own pockets in the process. I’m quite glad to see Darryl making an appearance. He’s one of my favorite characters from ‘The Office’ as he always seems to be in a constant state of “holy god, what a fucking idiot” whenever Michael is around… that makes me smile. I can’t wait to see how he smooth-talks the bank employees next week, but until then, enjoy this week’s webisode below:

Previous Webisodes: 1 | 2

Join me as our favorite fiscally irresponsible office accountant, Kevin Malone, takes a trip to the bank! I get the feeling he may not have done quite enough research before this meeting… you’d think if you were planning to defraud a financial institution you’d take a bit more time to get things in order before jumping right in. Well, Kevin must be a braver man than I. Enjoy.

And of course, if you missed out on Webisode 1, then you deserve to be kicked in the throat for not visiting more often. Oh, and you can check it out here!

I’d like to congratulate Kait and Kurtis on their recent nuptials. I had a hell of a good time drinking and partying it up with you guys and the rest of the fam this weekend and I wish you happy and fun-filled honeymoon!

On a related note, I’ll do my best to get some new posts up this week. I had quite the streak last week, and even went so far as to start writing nearly half a dozen additional posts before work and the weekend caught up with me. And don’t worry everyone… I’ll be posting my movie ticket totals as soon as I can. Stay tuned!

The Command & Conquer series has long held a warm, fuzzy place in my heart. When I first acquired my own personal computer at 14, Command & Conquer was there to welcome me into the realm of PC gaming. It was the first game to introduce me to the world of Real-time Strategy… until then, I’d been content with jumping on goombas and taking baddies out one at a time in the first-person perspective. Command & Conquer allowed me to build and control an entire army all my own, and I had a blast with it. Over the years as the games advanced and evolved into Red Alert, Tiberian Sun, Red Alert 2, Generals and C&C 3, I’ve enjoyed blasting my way through thousands upon thousands of Nod and Soviet scum, and I’ll be damned if I didn’t have a great time doing it. Every addition to the series has seemed to add something new and exciting to the franchise, from unit experience and leveling in Generals to the much-improved live-action cutscenes, graphics, and voiceover work in C&C3.

So with that in mind, I absolutely cannot wait for the release of the next installment of the Command & Conquer series: Red Alert 3! More than eight years since the release of the last Red Alert, this new incarnation looks absolutely gorgeous and is sure to blow all past C&C games out of the water. It’s nearly impossible for me to watch the below trailer and not drool on my keyboard. Hearing “Hell March”, one of the most badass songs every written for a video game, just brings back so many warm memories.

While we all wait in anticipation for the next season of The Office to hit the cable tubes this Fall, NCB has been kind enough to give us Internet-capable fans some tasty little glimpses into Dunder Mifflin’s off-season. The first of a number of webisodes has been posted on nbc.com, and it follows the exploits of our favorite office faux-tard Kevin. Watch below as he delves into the fraudtacular world of misused business loans!

For a glimpse into the upcoming Office webisodes, check out nbc.com (as long as you don’t mind being ocularly-raped by internet commericals).